So Ive decided I have serious issues. Im walking around the school with a bag labeled booze money collecting from people while slightly hungover at 8:20 in the morning, and nobody is questioning me.
Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
I'm still in shock that he came by my house for five minutes dropped off a Teddy bear and went to the strip club on valentines day
So help me Jesus we're never drinking together again. But weekends don't count. Amen.
Just woke up bloody and clutching a rear view mirror I'm pretty sure is from my car. For those of you keeping score at home this is why I stopped drinking four loko.
we need to find an occasion to wear tutus
I think my goal for this black wed is to not scream at an off duty state cop in a bar after trying to flirt with him. No need to make that an annual tradition
How am I feeling this morning? Well, besides the fact that my vagina looks like a pair of giraffe's lips and I'm walking like an over-confident cowgirl, I'm fantastic. Thanks for your concern.
On the bad side I puked, but on the bright side I puked lettuce which was a new experiance
Opened the apartment door and the smell of sex and weed literally slapped me across the face. Kudos.
These freshman guys were trying to holler at me from their window, and I realized about 20 minutes too late that the best possible reaction at that time would've been screaming "FLACCID PENIS". Oh, and I found this awesome zombie charm bracelet you would love.
Most drunken moment of the night is me pouring Chanel no. 5 all over your boobs and rubbing it in...
This is the nicest bathroom I've ever been drunk in. The urinal is gold.
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
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