Stage 55 clinger. not a typo. I cannot even believe this shit.
We did naked snow angels in 14 degree weather, you can't tell me you had more liquor at that party
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
I'm doing laundry from this weekend.. That poor shirt I wore to the rave smells like a dead animal that rolled in weed and pain..
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
Mom looked at me, frowned, and said "it makes me sad to see you drink before noon.." So i told her if she doesn't like it she needs to stop waking me up before noon.
If the ex isent in town and im crying under a table somewhere because of it can we go to a drag show or something
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
I was basically just fingering myself and thinking about space.
If you can handle my post-party look you da real MVP
I am pretty great at coffee and mistakes
I told her I'd rather set my hair on fire than sleep with her again. In retrospect, that was probably too harsh. My eye is still swollen shut.
it's like the easy bake oven version of plastic surgery
When I told her I was deaf and took my hearing aids out at night to sleep, she said it must be nice not having to hear drunken roommates having awkward sex late at night.
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
Randomize
