butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
I feel uncomfortable when she gargles my jizz.
Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
my night ended in me puking all over jenna's bed, then me trying to wash the sheets in the toilet.
I am assuming I was his dirty Mardi Gras mistake and I can live with that
Does peppermint hummus sound good or am I just high?
They got me high and left me at the mall with a giftcard for $400. I need an adult.
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..
One minute you were celebrating, the next you were bleeding all over your Nikes.
I just want you to know that I am dancing around my apartment by myself singing Taylor Swift into a wine bottle. Do hurry.
I am a murderer. I ran over so many baby frogs. I wanted to stop and pick some up to take home, but all I have is a wine bottle. I'd hate to explain that to a cop.
Sex on acid. Try it. I thought we were fucking in outer space with fireworks inside a rocketship car. Best.
Woke up with two different pairs of pants in the pockets of a jacket.None of the above are mine.
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