It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
thus making me awesome and them whores
ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
remind to leave next time the words "tequila" and "challenge" are shouted
Just had to masturbate in the bathroom because mom changed my room into a "knitting" room. I hate coming home.
I just saw a commercial for God of War and heard the nickname he gave my vagina.
Mike found the condom wrapper on the washing machine and looked at me and said "Magnum? NICE girl. Get that nut!" then proceeded to puke in a cup
For graduation he gave me roses, a giraffe necklace, and a butt plug. I think this might be my one shot at true love
I just had a great idea for an etsy shop. Sell all the shit bitches leave from one nighters
I was walking out the front door and heard his roomate say "It looks like you need a chiropractor." I think my work here is done.
Their children would look like the Michelin man and smell like chef Boyardee
I have just received a gold-medal-deserving sext. He wrote me a fucking novel. Not only am I incredibly turned on but I am beyond impressed. He is the sext god. I must bow to him.
God help them if any millennials are in the vicinity. Rent is too high and we no longer fear death
I WILL go to space. And if we find aliens I WILL fuck one. It’s the Marine Corps way
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