That's intense
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
I bought a fake diamond ring to wear, not only to bars to keep the creeps away, but so that I'll be judged less by the front desk girl at Planned Parenthood
How long does it take to cook a corndog over a candle?
note to self, drunkenly bedazzeling the silverware was a stupid fucking idea
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
The bouncers kicked us out around 3 so we went to the grocery store flasks in hand and asked them to turn up their music...
i don't even know why we got arrested this time. i think the cops just like our company at this point
I had a dream about a vibrator with 42 different settings. If that's not a good indication I need to get laid, I don't know what is
i need some food
Holy shit I forgot about you stabbing him.
He sent me nudes and then a text asking if I tried the new Cantina Bowl from Taco Bell. He sure does romance right, doesn't he?
Oh you know, the usual. We had a good date, I took her back home, she took off my pants, laughed, and left.
I just saw an ad for "fair trade quinoa vodka". Fuck this world and everyone in it.
I was singing Colors of the Wind and swigging vodka and still felt like more of an adult.
Randomize
