..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
This morning when you woke up you looked like one of the Wii Bowling people. I think it was the eyebrows combined with the sambuca
I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
i don't care what she did to you. we are not having sex in front of your sister.
You were in the bathroom for two hours practicing "Revenge Faces".
Speaking of morons, I just found half a Subway sandwich in the bathroom drawer You or your brother?
There're making snowcones with the leftover vodka from last night. This is not the time to be making up excuses!
I found him stumbling up to our building with a solo cup under his arm. . . He told me it was his favourite thing ever. He also told me hes never been drunk before.
Also, nothing screams "don't talk to me because I'm unstable" like walking around eating cookie dough out of the package.
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
Oh my god I haven't had mozzarella sticks since I banged that Applebee's waiter
I dropped my pants and she just stared until she asked how is that even possible? Best night ever lmao
where the fuck are you? she just tazed two people and we're tripping shrooms...successful first night in new apartment!
Dear god my vagina.
His birthday is on cinco de mayo and he doesn’t drink or like tacos. What a waste.
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