Ugh I have so many sins to confess tmw at church, you just made me think of many more I've made on that street alone
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
she looks like she scalped a horse for her weave
Remember when I booked a hotel room for next sat? Nneither do I.
I literally just wrote "I'm sorry" in my blue book, got up and walked out
Can you explain to me the broken disco ball in my front yard?
Don't pretend like we're functional. We're gonna discuss this drunkenly via text the way serious conversations should take place.
I want to get my vag crammed with complete loss of every bit of dignity I have left by this man from every angle on every flat surface that exists. That is all.
I NEED TO GET TO THE PLAYGROUND. I JUST NEED TO SWING. IF I SWING MAYBE THE SMELL WILL COME OFF OF ME. I NEED TO SWING
I guess I've just seen a lot of penises since then
Because 9 pm Thursday you drink a loco cause you just wanna get drunk and have a good time with your friends. Then you wake up on Tuesday and you've had 17 locos and you're pregnant, lying on the side of the road, 3 states over. THAT'S why we don't have only locos parties.
He tried to introduce me to one of his friends that kept looking at me and I said "OH NO! I can't do this shit anymore!!" It was like I had a vision of what drunk me would've done in about 20 minutes.
i could only love him more if he was covered in glitter.
Dude my toilet did not deserve what I just did to it
He was tied up with the electrical tape and force fed wine from a box. It was never going to end well.
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