o shit let me call u back theres a hamburger in my pocket
and that's why we call him explosion in my pants. no one remembers his real name.
Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
it wouldnt have been so bad but she still had the cowboy hat on when my mom walked in
Nothing good has ever or will ever come from 50 cent beers at the bowling alley..
I don't know what you told him but please make him stop telling me about his new video camera and winking
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
my six pack is really starting to show since I started fucking everything that moves
Precisely. She's an awesome drinking companion; yet, not so awesome mother-in-law material.
Know of anyone who would be interested in trading weed for meatballs?
The medical term is prolapsed anal walls if you want to look into it with dignity.
People like you and me aren't meant to go this long without having sex
What shade of lipstick clearly states, I'm only attending this wedding for the drugs and groomsmen?
BRB. These cougars are squabbling over my junk and one of them is offering to pay my tuition
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