tell ils to like buy her flowers and like a balloon that says, sorry I tried to fuck your sister. I think hallmark makes some of those cards too.
I just signed a document stating that I would dd all summer if they would go pickup food.
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
You'd be proud of me. They tried to give me bread to sober up, but I told them no, im on a diet.
Have you fucked anyone in the hospital yet because obviously this illness isnt worth it unless you do. I MISS YOUR HEALTH
officially christened the dorm room by sucking my spilled drink off the floor. tastes like homee
She thought that based on the way she feels that she got drugged last night, but come on, her turn on word is hello, who needs to drug that??
I just wanna be craddled in his arms and spoon fed applesauce..
that's the most romantic thing you've ever said.
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
I tried to pay my tab and go home but she wrote me a "list of things I'm good at" with fellatio as no 1...
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
Who gets call-your-ex-from-4-years-ago drunk on a Thursday??
I think I'm dead. Also I think I stole $20 from a stripper.
You did. Then gave it to me.
you would not believe who i just fucked on my lunch break
No I'm not high but I did cry for over an hour tonight because I realized that they never made a sequel to "Under the Tuscan Sun" with Diane Lane.
Randomize
