You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
puking up blue gatorade is not as nearly as much fun as it sounds
Yes, I did know where her mouth had been, but frankly I think it was a lesson you needed to learn.
They sent me to the hospital. Apparently, of the many things I said, I looked at the doctor and told him, "Wow... it's like you're a REAL DOCTOR!"
Well who could blame her. I would run away from me if I could.
I'm pretty sure I said "this might be the last time I'm in here" but then I took his pants off so that's a mixed message
Well anyways I still cant believe I don't remember such a monumental day in history as you showing me your boobs... Jesus
his first fb message to me in 3 years was "is your cock open for business?" im blocking him
Her name was Danica but I felt like it would be hard to say drunk so I called her Shelby
I just started an apology with "so I'm sorry about throwing the Brita at your head last night..."
Do not tell me I cant do drunk math ever again, AND I made a creative way of telling him I want him to fuck me.
School supplies are right next to the margarita mix at target. Its a sign
Is it appropriate to be taking shots at 11 on sunday?
Absolutely same thing as church only different
you tried to fight the cop who was busting the party, you said you had a constitutional right to do a keg stand...
Randomize
