and i had to drink on "never have i ever unsuccessfully tried to seduce a virgin ginger"
Did you write "I hope this gives you aids" on my box of capn crunch?
shattered his nose in 8 pieces. Blaming it on the dog. I feel more guilty about ruining the dog's good name than I do about ruining his nose.
She called to say she's single and blow job season is back.
The police report said that there were 25 cases of bud light, two hookers fighting in the street, 13 cop cars, and two road blocks, a kid got tazered, another got maced, and over a hundred people in the house
So that means its a bad thing that your dad found it huh?
It's surprise blowjob week. You should be excited.
I had a dream where I was about to fight you but you were dressed like a greek god and had just killed a werewolf with your bare hands
i woke up and found a picture of his grandma in my purse.. im a kelpto
Sorry I couldn't make it...got a scrambled voicemail, all I heard was "Bring the dildo"
Wearing rip off pants to a booty call last night was one of my most brilliant ideas ever.
Now I'm ashamed that I wore a bra
You have cats and a ten year IUD. Embrace it.
wow bdsm is so cute
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
Randomize
