U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
just found more coke in my pocket. i love not washing my jeans after every individual use.
Just found 2 diff. colored pubes in my underwear..new record.
you went around grabbing cigarettes out of peoples mouths and claiming you were curing cancer.
there is no 'pace myself' on the blackout express
Just had to throw up on the floor of my car during traffic on the way to work. Car next to me saw both times. Found the downside to having a job right after graduation.
Haha that's why you never name the penis. Its like a pet, once named you will most likely get attached.
Just saw you drinking out of a flask on national tv. I've never been more proud of you
Dude. I have so much pot that i only worry about running out of lighters
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
I have 39 hot sauces from Chipotle
It's like earning obesity badges
Please tell me last night did not happen and there is another reason why my phone smells like ranch sauce ahahah
i found you laying on the floor staring at the ceiling and you kept muttering "why" in various inflections.
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
Randomize
