You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
He keeps looking? I tried to shag. I invited him to this table but he went to ze other one! If he shaves his 'tache I would totally hit it.
This girl brought half a watermelon to class. I want to be on her level.
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
I apologize for getting really drunk, taking off my shirt, bitching someone out, crying, and breaking something at your party next weekend...
Ladies, we have an appointment at David's Bridal aurora this coming Sunday at 3pm. And an appointment at where ever tequila is served at noon.
in my defense, he kept drinking all of my water.
he had diabetes and you told him to stop being a pansy!
Girl just walked into the bar with a T-shirt that says "I'm not Irish, kiss me anyways." Target aquired.
Sorrye. The bathtuv says hi. But theresno water in it. I've wanted too tell you for the longest, but nevr could
Are you responsible for the syringes and miniature cactus garden that has magically taken over my fridge?
Remember that time I sent you a 5lb bag of gummie bears?
Like it was yesterday.
Apparently I had it on auto deliver. So whoever is at your apt is gonna gen an interesting delivery...
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
How was your night?
I spent a lot of money and drank a lot of booze. Also was part of a successful search party
I gotta stop fucking the bouncers. We are running out of bars to go to.
Just used a NyQuil cup to take a shot. This night is headed nowhere good.
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