I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
tfor prom could you pick me up wo bottles of champagne and a condom, please?
yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
I will show your tits more attention than Michael Jackson's death.
did we hook up?
no, because you kept repeating "itty bitty titties" when i took off my shirt
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
I got to find out the airplane alcohol limit, and somehow I made it through the flight.
I wish you would just come have sex with me in ihop. I don't want to be here
He's the kind of drunk guy that would pee in your mouth while you give him head.
Yes. I am getting trashed on an open tab while judging a karoke competition
Impressive. I approve.
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
When I wake up, please remind me why my shoe is in the toilet, my shower is filled with jello, and there is a naked girl sleeping on my coffee table holding a bag of Cheetos. that is all.
So help me God.... if he sends me a dick pic.... I will make it so he has to eat food through a tube in his nose and poop into a bag by his belly button
The worst part is there are all kinds of happy creatures out here like fucking snow white and i'm sitting in semi-dead grass, hungover with a burnt butt
Randomize
