how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
Stop it. You sound like you're giving birth.
you were watching a documentary about sharks and wouldn't stop stroking my legs and whispering "what if they could walk?"
We should make a goal to do one active thing a day, even if its like throwing a ball
And by ball i mean playing catch. Beer pong does not count as an activity
We talked about all of the sex positions that would better allow him to feed me grapes. I think I'm in love.
Made it just outside my dorm and yack on the front dirt. Wave to a dad thats staring, continue on my way.
It's a sad statement on my day when the high point was getting a pap test.
Did we seriously steal a wet floor sign from McDonald's then get chased down by a homeless man for it? Never drinking again.
she made me cum so hard I dislocated my jaw. I'm keeping her
The Dick I got last night was so phenomenal that I had to take a fucking personal day today.
Well I'm trying out this whole "not sleep with a stranger thing"
That's silly... just silly. And by silly I mean unrealistic.
Not sure, she said after cussing out the dentist they called security. Make that the first person I know 86'ed by a dentist.
You are currently doing Harry Potter spells with the turkey-baster...
he was wearing pj pants, thank you for not letting me go home with him
you can't just call dibs on my vagina bro.
Randomize
