If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
Don't pass out before midnight like you did last year. See how much your year sucked
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
Come, dress lightly, bring tequila...
Noooo. We thought it would be funny for him to wake up buried in the sand. But we just remembered about the whole high tide thing and it's dark and it's pretty damn hard to find an unconscious head sticking out of the sand. Just help us out
Learned my lesson. Pink pantydroppers out of a beer bong=deceiving
Btw. Made out with a random kid at a frat. It's all good though. He invited us to his frat party tomorrow so yay! For having plans!
We told our cab driver we'd give him 3 grand if he pit maneuvered you guys in your cab.
SHE GRABBED MY FULLY ERECT DICK IN A BAR AND STUCK HER TONGUE DOWN MY THROAT AND I COULD NOT CLOSE
Yup. Dog walker, house sitter and mistress to the rich, bored and bi-curious. I've got a nice little operation running.
My roommate told me he found me naked in the shower puking and when he asked why I was naked I said "you can't wear clothes in a shower"
Can we just agree for a moment that semen in your sinuses is the fucking worst?
Randomize
