Just got yelled at by a priest...again.
im just going to superglue mistletoe to my forehead and see what happens
he thinks im joking when i say don't visit. i mean it's summer...he was the college fuck and now it's time for the summer fuck
I would have rather watched a full length video of myself masturbating than heard that.
This milkshake tastes better than sex. Priorities, I have them.
I have no idea what to do about this. He has a power over me and I think its called his tongue.
I don't know what to tell you, usually I would just ask if they'd like to meet the captain. If you can't get laid it's your problem.
I'm drinking wine alone, eating leftovers, and cleaning my sex toys. For the love of god, do not graduate.
I FEEL like I celebrated someone's 21st, but really I just celebrated Tuesday.
Let me begin to explain the rest of last night by beginning with saying that out if necessity I took a pair of your underwear
Is it weird that I want to have sex wearing my glasses and lab coat while having an actual scientific discussion?
Dear Jesus. Send me strength to not suck cock this morning.
I mean I'd assume the strange looks are on account of the fact that I'd imagine people normally don't stink of booze on an 8:14am flight.
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
i think i left you like a 5 minute message about the mcchicken burger i was eating. I think I called wanting sex but the mcchicken burger was a lot more seducing.
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