3:38a: you guys up to anything right now?
Oh shit. I just had to lure him into the bedroom so I could take the list of his negative qualities off the fridge so he wouldn't see.
God. I look like such a fucking stand up guy wearing polo shirts. You would totally trust me not to date rape you.
you yelled then hung up at the girl on information bc she could not pinpoint your location and tell you how to get to dennys
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
He's sitting on the floor holding his bracket and crying, literally crying... he just keeps saying "Kansas how could you?" over and over
I only have two new blunt burns this year as opposed to freshman year's 6. This is growing up.
you two started sword fighting with 3 ft tall spruce trees you pulled out of planters
You were walking around in your swim suit, an open robe, snow boots and a death grip on that handel of captain morgan.
Apparently he crashed because 3 different girls were trying to give him road head at the same time.
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
I'm not going to say what I did. You're smart enough to figure it out. But I did it. And you owe me 20$
Sorry, was sleeping. I heard a rumor that I had a hangover, so I just went with it...
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
Randomize
