i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
i was so drunk i stopped mid-blowjob to make sure he i was with my boyfriend and not some random. twice.
I woke up with a solved rubics cube in my purse
Not many best friends can say they've all made out with a homeless guy
I think god is proud of me so he is rewarding me in discounted wine
will i regret this in the morrning? probably. but every decision is good during happy hour
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
Can I also remind you that we insisted on touching his mustache?
Well of course I remember it took up like 20 minutes of my night.
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
you were caressing the jar of pickles then you looked down and whispered to them "I want you inside me"
The free coupon that printed out with the purchase of my plan b emergency contraception was for allergy meds. I feel like a coupon for condoms would've been more fitting in this situation.
Oh wait. It's for wart remover. Fitting, afterall.
You faceplanted on the railroad tracks and when I tried to tell you to get up, you told me you were "taking a quick breather"
slept at my ex’s house last night and as i was leaving his brother was sitting there on the sofa and said “bet you regret that one don’t ya”
Why is this not the first time I’ve seen the mugshot of someone I’ve slept with
Leave it to my mom and I to turn the hearing into a drinking game.
Randomize
