Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
started her walk of shame as my mom and dad walked through my common room door...my dad held the door for her and told her to have a nice day
Random fact of the day: cum is a really good eye makeup remover
that blow job was not worth the clinginess that will follow
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
could you clean the juice and feathers off my bed I'm just not up for hangover cleaning.
You know why nobody comes up with Sober October? Other than it's Oktoberfest? Because Sober October doesn't benefit anyone, just like your judgment isn't benefiting me. I'll talk to you in November. Unless you make up another alcoholless month.
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
I just had to take my laptop away from him because he was on Amazon and had 20 Seahawks garden gnomes in his cart.
woke up in your bed at 6 AM. on my way home I passed Nathan, bloody, barefoot, and still in a toga. He told me he woke up in a ditch then kept repeating "I'm totally bringing this up at meeting tomorrow". I'm proud of your frat today
he just fluffed my hair and told me I had to dance with him because we were both gingers.
Fly, little bird! Repopulate the ginger race!
I'm spring cleaning all of the fuck boys out of my life.
"He didn't answer my snap so I know he's arrested"
Randomize
