champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
walking in back of a girl wearing booty shorts, a halter and a bracelet that says trainwreck. I don't get it. The first day of nice weather and all the whores come out, are they like hibernating bears or something?
guess who has a date tonight
look at you growing up, going on dates before she hops into bed
I just cleaned your Jaeger vomit off my car with a knife. Don't ever say I don't love you.
Not even drunk me wanted to have sex with him. I kept intentionally hitting my head on the table behind me during sex till he said i was too drunk for sex.
After the nose/jizz incident i think our relationship can handle anything.
You crossed every boundary on the boundary spectrum last night. You're like the illegal immigrant of drunk actions. No more holiday drinking for you.
We're having chugging races with long island ice tea, I won. To often
Yeah, he's passed out in my bathroom pantsless. Is it a faux pas to look at his penis?
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
but real talk, he made 1 phone call last night and had someone bring us tacos at 3am so idk I might be inlove
I just moonwalked my socks off. THAT LAZY. THAT HIGH.
He is a sex God. It lasted more than an hour, and I don't remember how many times I came. I lost count at 57.
It's alright. I'm just trying to make her realize you're not good enough for her.
Someone needs to get Mark off the roof. I told you that he doesn’t shut up about ancient Egypt if you give him henny.
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