he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
I was thinking about him in the shower then i get out of the shower and there was a text from him
its like he has a camera inside of my shower that looks into my brain
dude. i was so high. i watched shrek in russian.
I got so high that I decided to drive with my knees on the way home. Where am I going in life?
Nowhere
You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
he was holding his dick in one hand and my boob in the other and i looked down and thought, this is my life
He bought me Ben & Jerrys and then apologized for the fact that he was going to fall asleep before we could have sex
I only put bad things in my body...jack, caffeine, chocolate, pills, and rich's cock. It's like being holistic but exactly opposite
I have migrated to the couch. Minimal movement is still happening, but I should be mobile enough to go to the liquor store by eight.......so that good.
Got stoned and went to Walmart. For some reason a preacher walked up and asked if I knew the lord so I just yelled "I CAN FEEL HIM IN MY VIENS" at the top of my lungs. he left after that.
So feel off my bed lastnight into the trashcan. On the plus side i thought under my bed was a cave and i went exsploring
I found my spirit animal in the shower. It's a sloth/bear that lives in my chest.
my grandpa paid for my boob job but he just doesn't know it.
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
Yeah I passed out. The last thing I remember is the lady telling me I couldn't play the clarinet with my nose.
Randomize
