i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
Dude, she uses Old Spice. It smelled like I was eating out my grandfather.
it's like your virginity...sometimes you have to pretend like it's still there
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
When he goes down on me, he stares me in the eyes like a shark mocking it's prey as it devours it. Plus, his beard smells like dirty gym socks. This has got to end.
You look cute and you are awesome. And that means something coming from a judgmental bitch
I'm hungover as hell. I'm dying. I have no skin left on my knees
My roommates just built a mini golf course upstairs while I was sleeping.
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
I yelled at the dude who smoked him up "YOU'RE THE REASON I'M NOT GETTING LAID" then went to bed. So yeah, I guess it was an ok night.
He's a fucking asshole. Who gives good head. And seriously I have never seen someone less committed to hair color
I was on all fours trying to empty the bowl we smoked into the sewer when your neighbor came out, but besides that it went smoothly
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
Its 9 am & i've been cleaning for 6 hours now with occasional crying bursts and two cocktails. Adulting 101.
Well, I turned down sex again. This is guy #5 in the past 2 weeks. My vagina is going to seek emancipation.
Randomize