Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
For real. Like, if I ever had to choose a last meal, I would just choose to get high and eat whatever was around.
Did we have sex last night or did we just wake up naked covered in oil?
you flashed the cab driver so we didn't have to pay the fare and then you decided you were on a roll so you flashed the guy at the maccas drive through... safe to say your boob job was the best idea ever!!
No I'm not proud of you for not sleeping with him. He has herpes. You don't get a gold star for behaving how you're expected to. Trust me. I'm a teacher.
I've decided the third guy that I slept with is who I lost my virginity to...
If we both stop thinking about your penis for just a moment, we'd realize it is important and good that you are spending quality time with your family
girl I've been sleeping with this summer as per her request just gave me a carton of cigs to thank me for my "hospitality". this is good.
rolling absolute tits, turn on the red lights for when i get home.
I took 20 bucks from you because when I woke up I saw more of you than I ever wanted to see bro.
Totally acceptable.
Why aren't you two playing Dora the explorer with each other's genitals yet?
Woke up to the frozen soundtrack blasting in the living room best one night stand ever
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
I'm pretty sure the guy who was grinding on me while I was trying to get a drink at he bar was one of my tinder matches
Next time I think it’s a good idea to hook up with any of your wife’s family members or friends just kick me in my dick
Randomize
