Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
my mom walked in on my vaccuming.......i wasnt vaccumming
I just heard a teenager say to his friend "dats my baby! i was hittin her up on myspace like gurllll. she got me steamin". must have missed the memo its 2005 and we still use myspace.
I JUST GOT MY PERIOD AND MY VISA FOR LONDON GOT APPROVED! BEST DAY EVER!
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
It was literally like being eaten out by a dog. That bad.
i think the beer goggles wore off after hearing the story of her 2nd abortion
I forgot I did whipits. Probably because my brain cells were killed from the whipits
Dude, please tell me you know why there's a naked chick asleep outside my room.
I have so many feelings about this burrito
Like you haven't hit rock bottom until you have had to throw your own turd out a window
Let us rub each other in fish scales and become mermaids
Banging to Billy Joel pandora is like russian roulette. But I made him cum to Let It Be so I we both walked away victors
Remember how I have such good luck that it's almost bullshit?
I'm afraid to ask, but go on.
You claimed that someone else had vomited underneath you/on your hand
you were very insulted that we didn’t believe you that someone else vommed
Randomize
