The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
My lack of memory is directly related to being friends with you.
All I want in this world right now are Doritoessssss
OK. You going to get home safe? Who are you with?
Doritoesssssss
he rubbed his balls on my face to wake me up.. this friends with benefits thing is getting out of hand.
We were confused who drove until we went outside and her cupholders were torn out of the dash and laying on the ground
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
Dude, you passed out sitting straight up AND in mid sentence last night
Just got discharged from the hospital after getting my finger stitched back together don't you dare say you had a worse night than me
This late night dumpster diving sesh is making my quads cramp up
I know but at least you've never been asked to have sex dressed up like Catwoman
Look, all I'm looking for is a good time and someone whose chest I can bury my face in
You know your Halloween costume is slutty when you have to shave your pubes to wear it.
K. The dog and I are outside. The Uber driver said "I hope he fucks the shit out of you"
Remember the guy with the pretty voice that gave us crabs?
Randomize
