sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
i have my own cum on my nose right now. don't talk to me about "embarrassed".
You realize at the bar last night we blew on imaginary whistles like rose from titanic right?
I saw you eating fruit and doing shots off people passed out
Ps. I feel like I may pee myself this weekend. Either drunkenly or out of excitement. Toss up
Maybe STDs were invented to keep stupid people from having kids.
Ur dog was like a damn middle school chaperone this morning trying to lay between us after what he saw us do last night
What happened to the good old days when we whispered the words beer pong and people came running?
When a bartender remarks "wow" on how quickly you've finished a drink... Is that good or bad?
I feel like we should apologize to the light saber. We were REALLY inappropriate with it last night.
College: when you wake up drunk without pants and wearing a Cosby sweater
If someone told me one person in the department was secretly a death eater, I would suspect her, no contest.
I've just been thinking about sangria a lot lately, like an adult.
I woke up naked buried in snacks. Best night ever.
Randomize
