My insides feel lik shag carpet. It is awesome
dude stop sending me pictures of your dick in weird places. i get it. you rock out with your cock out.
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
sitting on the counter. eating honey. crying, because coldplay sounds beautiful on the radio. highhhhh as the sky
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
Just sharpening my eyeliner with a butterfly knife. You know. Typical weekday morning.
You kept going up to guys in plaid and screaming "are you a lumberjack" in their faces
I owe you cheese. The drunk munchies don't acknowledge food ownership.
Is it possible to sluttify a hobbit costume? Cause if so, this will be my biggest accomplishment.
FUCK. EVERYONE MAKE MY CONTACT NAME DADDY ISSUES
You tore a poster off a lamppost and ATE IT. That drunk.
No, not if I told them not to. they listen to me. I have a vagina.
I love you man I just want to hold you and fuck you until you only know my name
I don't know who you are but HOW THE FUCK DID YOU GET MY NUMBER
You told me that you couldn't come over because you felt like you were gonna die and that houses eat you when you die, and my house couldn't eat you because your house would be jealous. That's when I knew to take the bowl away from you.
Dad is wasting no time getting back out there. Just walked in on him and a Twin Peaks waitress in the hot tub
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