woke up this morning wit a massive hangover. walked to my truck and found at least 35 for sale signs, a stop sign, and a julie kim sign...need answers
yea, you decided to become a real estate agent last night on the way home from the party. You started bitchin about how Julie Kim was stealing all your buisness....
Just got a citation from campus security for an "accordion disturbance."
she was left over bi-product, like the hotdog of the human race
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
I have no words
Neither did my mom, when she walked in on me squating with my balls in a cup of hot water.
Yeah but I was the kid who ran over your BMW and is banging your 15 year old daughter... There isn't a cool enough dad in the world to make that work.
I am his drunk Jesus. I will love him from afar because he's my little lamb
I got turned off after he said, "i can see us in the future...me, you, and a back yard full of alpacas."
I hurt myself, but I'm pretty sure I saved the carpet.
I don't care what the Chinese zodiac calendar says . . . 2015 is the year of the cock!
I CLEANED MY BATHROOM FOR YOU!! betrayal
Straight up last night my mom was like josh you need to find a job that doesn't include the selling or transporting of drugs
my gyno just used the expression "dick around." too far?
Randomize