This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
You got in a fight last night?
Yeah! Some dude in the bathroom...he was standing there and I notice he's got the same shirt as me on so I'm like...dude you should have called me, we look like idiots...he didn't say anything...so i got pissed and hit him...completely decimated and my hand was all bloody and covered with glass afterward...weird dude, never saw him again that night or since.
Um...Did this guy happen to look almost exactly like you?
I wish i could clap on, clap off my penis
me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
she made me cover her fishbowl with my shirt because she "didn't want to corrupt it."
You asked the dj to play 'who let the dogs out" because it was your birthday. You left the bar and then re-entered to the song
The professor just announced to the class that I talked to him in the bar on my birthday.
May or may not have found my way onto a stripper bus. To Chicago.
I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
there's a liquor store near my therapist
i might give it a shot.
You both sound like you need to get shit faced, fight it out, and have makeup sex.
I just offered a cat a "drinky drinky" I'd say my night has started
UGH FUCK THIS TRAFFIC I WANNA SUCK A DICK
I've decided to give up hard drugs for the rest of the year.
So uh. Your future in porn. Would you be willing to wear an alien costume for it?
Randomize
