This girl is more easily done than said...
come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
I jsut got pulled over and passed the sobritaty test.
Good thing spelling doesn't count.
So I guess I passed out face first on the ground while trying to grill last night
You high fived me for banging your sister but lock me outta house bc I ate your pumpkin pie? Priorities bro
Nicee. Atleast your phone doesn't change pen in to PENISsSSSSSSS like mine does
It was either the harsh truths I was divulging or the liquor..... But either way, I made mom puke
it wasn't until he got that douchey haircut that i started regretting sleeping with him
Some guy offered you 100 bucks last night to suck your toes. I had to drag you away while you were yelling at me, "Stop money cock blocking me!"
That's just where I'm at in my life.
She's running around the streets punching people and narrating. I don't know whether to laugh or stop her
He came home at 2 AM on roller skates with his hair dyed pink while singing "Sweet Transvestite" and throwing glitter on all of us and everything we own. We had to call a cleaning guy.
There comes a point where there's just condoms and old mcdonalds in your garbage can and you can't tell if you've won or lost.
He just chose domino's over sex. ARE YOU KIDDING ME?
why yes, bad decisions will be made starting at 3PM Thurs through 8PM on Sun. You have been warned. Plan accordingly.
We're getting a bucket of chicken and screwing around, so no, you can't join us.
Randomize
