he's super hid and wouldn't leave us alone so i snatched his phone and started texting lovelink (thanks for a well-timed commercial) that will cost him money. muhahaha
omg a stripper jus od'd on stage.
she kept checking the clock when she was giving me head and at midnight she said she had to stop because she cant eat meat on fridays is that bitch serious
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
If you hook up with a kid and the next day he breaks up with his girlfriend, those can be seen as two completely unrelated incidents right?!
It was drunk tag. I was Alice in wonderland chasing a ballerina who was chasing Lance Armstrong who had needles in his arms.
Happy meals everywhere. I think Ronald McDonald Claus visited.
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
Not sure if creeper guy is too drunk to talk or I'm too high to listen.
my poor anus
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
Thanks for being my pregnancy scare Sherpa...
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
Best single mom victory - getting eaten out in my dodge caravan in the hospital parkade at midnight.Three words: screaming multiple orgasms.
Randomize
