can you buy anything in the cafeteria for less than $2? I spent the last of my laundry money on a chia pet
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
I was under the impression that I sent actual words. turns out it was a series of letters and question marks on a side note we still had sex
theres 5 guys on the side of the road with beads and their shirts off screaming at cars already.
what's an appropriate "I'm fucking your grandson but I'm trying to hide it" outfit?
Just heard one of my friends say, "if you're trying to take advantage of me I really dont care. I just want this beer." ..
You're mold. I may or maynot have puked blood this morning.
I either have a razor blade lodged in my throat or I've been drinking entirely too much Evan Williams.
And it was in that moment when I realized that these high schoolers looked up to me and that I should set a good example. So I stole a casserole and left.
Notice how both of our plans for hooking up with these guys involve getting them drunk?
Oh my God, we're like men but with great boobs.
I knew I'd like her from the moment she supported me messing around with my co-worker on my lunch break
I also woke up in a guys bed in a Reptar shirt yesterday morning staring at a movie theater sized poster of the not as popular Air Bud franchise movie Super Buddies.
Did I call him? He cried after taking my bra off. You tell me.
It finally happened my mom knowingly gave me money to buy drugs i knew this day would come\n
I only gave you one rule about using the beach house: don’t get cum on anything!
You’ve seen my tits! You had to know that rule was unrealistic! Does it help that he was really cute?
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