youve choked your chicken with your arm asleep and acted like it was some1 else right?
bahahaha. this guy working at subway literally has someone's name tattooed on his arm, crossed out, and another name below it.
Leave Me Alone
At least least me cry on your voice mail
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
My night sucks. It's really hard to masturbate with a broken finger.
Found a pic of me suckling your nipple at the bar. Safe to say you don't want this one tagged?
I just woke up in his house on his bathroom floor with an IV in my arm.
Fran... I put my tongue in somebody's gage hole last night.
todays sighting is titled: Bum taking pictures with an invisible camera.
Is it possibile to sprain your taint?
She was that bad?
I taught her to play Monopoly. She sold me her bra to keep from going bankrupt.
I am drunk at 8am listening to Cyndi Lauper and dressed up in a penguin suit
falling asleep on a hardwood floor changes a person
Just walked outside my house; realized I wasn't wearing any pants after about 3 minutes or so.
Drunk, high, hungover?
...I wish I had an excuse.
Good news! Blood’s flowing!
Randomize