dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
If I've learned one thing today? Blow jobs get you to state championships.
Alright. Who did it? Who's bangin' the ump?
What about the words "You're my personal dildo" made him say "I love you"?
better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
if you don't go out with us, what are you gonna do? you're gonna go home and watch biodome and masturbate to texts from your east coast boyfriend and see the facebook pictures from the party when you wake up.
I scrubbed the bathroom, smoked a bowl, and gave myself 3 orgasms. If the world ends today, I feel accomplished.
She just called to say she can support a full bottle of vodka between "the girls" now. I'm going over, don't try and stop me.
He is crying over the toilet and his friends just came in and tried to make him take another jello shot.
I told him i turn boys gay hoping that would scare him off. Finally i found a way to take advantage of my disability.
No you don't understand. This tree is really alive. Like in Pocahontas.
I did a kegel this morning to determine if I had been penetrated during last night's blackout. Nope.
Have you ever got so drunk that you tasted the future?
They said you went back in for 30 minutes and were walking with your arms out like an eagle soaring
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
I want to respect them as people, but really I just want to have sex with them.
Randomize
