I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night.
Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry...
Sometimes I wonder if we could be friends if we lived closer.
Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
Just got an Edible Arrangement my parents sent me for my birthday. Time to marinate some fruit in vodka.
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
I created another version of Halloween, it's called swalloween, whatever girl in a slutty costume you bring home has to swallow or forever be known as the holiday grinch
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
I should become a firefighter. Who uses his cock to fight fires. Like a Superhero.
Why is "Oprah of drinks" written on my arms?
You said to write it on you, after you kept saying, "You get a drink, you get a drink, everyone gets a drink."
the only thing she has in her apt so far is toilet paper and shot glasses. you can see where the priorities lie.
He caught me shoving meatballs into my mouth using my hand. Fuck utensils. It’s Christmas...and this is why I’m single.
They are good meatballs.
I wonder how vigorously I can jack off in a one person tent without being noticed???
Do you remember standing up at 3 in the morning and asking me if I was counting to six?
Thank you for stopping me from getting a butt tattoo. That was a good call.
Randomize
