is it true you fucked a yoga instructor last night??! ..and let me know if you want me to post that question on your facebook so kelly can see how happy you are without her
she always made me post sex PB&Js it was like fucking a trashier Martha Stewart
who loves string cheese????? I LOVE STRING CHEESE!!!
you know...if you didn't give such great head little things like this would ruin our friends with benefits relationship.
sorry for throwing an entire water bottle of vodka at you. It was very wasteful
just got tipped $5 to put a barbie in a waffle cone and drip caramel sauce on it while a group of dudes cheered and one took pics. 90% sure they were sober
You peed in my camelbak and said it was a reverse catheter. Not cool.
20 bottles of wine, 3 cases or beer, and 5 bottles in my kitchen... My parents are teasing me.
Just got a Snapchat of his dick with the caption 'We miss you.'
That's true love, there.
I got "plug" during family Catch Phrase and struggled to not make a reference to butt plug so I skipped it
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
PENIS EMOJIS WOULD MAKE MY LIFE SO MUCH EASIER GAH WHY DOES THE WORLD HATE ME
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
is it bad that I'm more worried about having to take out my piercings than the fact that I might be having a kid
We’re leaving where are you
Hold on Toxic just started playing
I did a line off of, and then danced on top of a table older than this country.
Harvard is great.
Randomize
