my roommates friend slept in my bed when i was out of town..she ran out screaming cause she saw my VCR
I was just standing there and then BOOM! She was attacking my face with her mouth.
I don't get it, man. She treated me like a sexual predator but treated you like a piece of meat.
First guy to fuck a girl in the new tool shed. Her underwear is on the shovel hook.
Apparantly 7 1/2 Vicodin is a 1/2 too many.
Ok, let's play "if you were a slut" again and try and retrace our steps last night..
False alarm I know hes alive because when i tried shaking him awake he pissed his pants and rolled over..
You offered me some of your "Jungle Juice." It was just 151 and Absinthe. I don't know how you are still alive.
HELP A SISTER OUT. AND KEEP YOUR TONGUE OUT OF THE HUMMUS.
TOO HIGH TO FIGURE THIS SHIT OUT
You were dancing with a coffee pot of rum in one hand and a joint in the other. So that should explain everything.
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
WHY IS FOOD SO DELICIOUS
BECAUSE SCIENCE
We bought a pool from walmart at 2am...and to make matters even more white trash we headed to Applebee's for half off appetizers and corona-ritas
WELL THEN WHAT DAY IS IT?!?! This whole having to choose between ruining my future and ruining my liver is totally killing my vibe
A picture of a damn cupcake brought back 3 fuckboys
Just saw a girl I banged wearing a pro life shirt downtown. Not sure where to start with that.
Randomize
