Is it a little weird that I have a ridiculous urge to have sex while the theme song to the Pirates of the Carrbibbean blares in the background?
Last night was an abortion. I might need a publicist.
He thanked me for being "his little blond pogo stick last night". Good thing?
i had to take my roommates dildo out of her suitcase so I could use it
the suitcase or the dildo?
my whole body is tingling just thinking about the orgasm hes going to give me
It was a deal breaker when she told me not to wear a condom and god would decide if we were meant to be together.
If I don't survive tonitght I would like to thank you for the ricekrispy treats. I am majestic
according to last night, I underestimated the size of my mouth and the possibilities of what can fit into it.
Are you up yet? I really want to know if i tried sleeping in a field... i have the vaguest memory of trying to
He got me a cake that said " Congratulations on the dick "
orgasmnado...tomorrow night
That's what I'm talking about
The memory of your penis haunts me. I must learn to be satisfied with lesser men than you.
The cop told me I was the prettiest guy he'd arrested in a while. I'm still not sure if it was a come on or not.
Oh goddamn. That a super downer Tuesday reality right there. Just hit me with the cold, hard, nasty facts.
I feel like sleeping with foreign people is a long term investment. It's like a time share. Now when I go to London I have a place to stay.
Randomize
