i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
we're making bets on your personal life
No. Especially when my uncle started stripping. Too many shots. So that's where I get that from.
Well i'm not entirely sure considering he gave my vagina an early valentine's day card that said "you're purrfect."
I'm pretty sure this is how polyamorous relationships begin.
she was rubbing her elbow against the fish tank and laughing hysterically then she said I'M THEIR FISHY GOD and watched harry potter
I just woke up in bed, rolled over, and found a whole pizza.
this is the second day in a row.
Oh. Yeah. It's the same pizza then.
In her drunkenness, she packed a bag with tequila, two shot glasses, salt, a knife, and two pears. She was prepared but too high to distinguish pears from limes.
I JUST LIKE FLANNEL, NOT VAGINAS! OK?
Philosophical question for you: is it better to go into work slightly drunk or slightly coked out?
Seriously, I really just burned my nipple making ravioli.. I'd explain, but no reasoning makes this acceptable:/
Fuck my life... Im so horny Im gonna take it out on this sandwich
I love you. Doing a double. Going to die. It will be painful. Let the world know i partied. God, did i party.
Get your dick back in here. On Saturdays, you're not allowed to leave my bed unless it's to make me bacon or coffee.
Randomize
