Phease come get me i thought i was in a place i don't even understand
worst. lesbian. ever. i'm not sure she knows a clit from a pencil eraser.
i woke up this morning cuddling with a 3 foot statue of Jesus. heaven here i come
On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like
It didn't get weird until she took off her underwear, looked down, and said "fill her up!"
i've learned that i'm good at stealing things. like live cats.
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
How long after mardi gras is it considered okay to wake up topless and wearing beads?
It would just be icing on the fucked up cake we're baking, if he got me pregnant.
I bought left over pizza from a guy on Craigslist.
I just accepted my offer to work as a camp counselor over the phone between shots of Fireball. This is going well for me so far.
Today is National Blunt Day in the Great State of Me. Come ovah
Found another bruise from Saturday #stopliquor2014
You're acting like you didn't chug fireball, like duh you have bruises you drunk betch
sooo, that video of you eating lasangna with the strobe going magically reappeared on my phone
So, 'head before the store' turned into a fuck fest, & that's how I ended up at the grocery store smelling like a cum farm on Black Friday. How's your weekend?
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