You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
can we please take bets on how much therapy you'll need in the future?
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
She paints her nails the color of the sheets of the last guy she slept with
That glade motion activator thing keeps going off every time we pass the bong. I don't know what I'm getting high off right now.
Her tits were the only thing that upgraded her from "no way in fuck" to "drunken mistake"
Just whatever you do please don't lick his face again.
I think, at this point, getting pissed and declaring my love via reality TV would be an improvement
She had a cast on when I met her, but she blamed me for breaking her arm this morning. I'm gonna marry this girl.
I'm on acid right now in three feet of snow. I NEEEED YOOOOUUUU
Client visitor days are the worst. If I have to wear a tie and can be hungover at least have the decency to find some more attractive visitors
Well while you were being a dick I was taping back together a cougars broken heart
It was extremely weird and uncomfortable mid blow job she looks up and says " tell me Simon Cowell makes your dick hard"
I got a lap dance in honor of your birthday last night.
Thank you.
theres a video...
oh god.
He's asking how tall I am he wants to make a body suit out of me
Randomize
