do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
Being a girl sucks.
Being a boyfriend sucks for about a week, too
My face smells like vagina and Im on my way to court. Fuck.
My dinner was lean cuisine and tequila. Aaaaaand I need a boyfriend.
buying new sheets for when my mom visits. I can't in good conscious let her use the ones from last night
Why is there an appointment in my calandar called "get the fuck to the bus" at 3 am june 19th?
Woke up covered in green glitter and beer. I am never leaving Ireland.
If I get aids I am starting a lawsuit against snapchat.
Time to eat Mexican food til I hate myself.
That's completely alright, I do it a lot.
Nothing like drunkenly buying a pregnancy test at 8 am to get out and realize your nip was out the whole time.
It was bitter sweet because I woke him up with sex but then I peed in his bed with him in it
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
So unofficially, he told me he deleted tinder because of me. I think that's a pretty romantic gesture in 2018.
I just peed on myself the semester has officially began.
Thanks for not letting me choke to death on my vomit last night
Thank you for attempting to organize my DVDs in chronological and alphbetical order
Randomize
