i have it on good authority that she is not as good at giving head as she claims she is
so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
Does your gf have any friends she can hook me up with?
Better looking than her though please.
After she came with my hands around her neck, she sat there for a minute and gave me the scuba diving sign for a-ok.
Guess who won bingo at the senior center and is going to jail all in the same night?
just woke up in my car, in front of the bar. Took me 10 minutes to find my keys which were about 10 yards away in a bush. According to my phone records, I called my ex 14 times last night. Breakfast?
Waking up next to a 3 inch puddle of water in my kitchen with a bathing suit on...what the fuck went on lastnight
I'm pretty sure "tag teaming" and "looking for stability" are not synonymous.
Not yet.
There is a 1000000% chance you'll be turned down if you try coming on to me while I watch Star Wars.
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
He put his burrito in the bag with his dildo.
I have no idea what to do with myself since we graduated.
I've just been napping and sexting all day.
Hey can you send me a pic of your breast with a peace sign in the photo? I'm trying to win a scavenger hunt contest. Thanks so much
you said you were going to the bathroom. we found you an hour later laying in the backyard clutching a bottle of vodka while singing the beatles and crying
I should not have moved in with him. He's got porn stashed everywhere like a homosexual squirrel.
You love porn!
Not in the sugar bowl when I'm making my Mom coffee I don't.
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