guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
I was hoping we just happened to wake up naked and I hadn't fucked him.... no such luck.
OK, the bar's closing. Do I go to home to my wife or my girlfriend?
Tequila shots with cinnamon and orange write it down before I forget
I just woke up to pictures of every angle of his dick I'll ever need to see.
I've got to stop making out with the guys and sharing drinks with you. I'm the reason we all get sick at the same time. Sorry.
He came in my nose, then said it would help clear my sinuses.
I gave up trying to understand them years ago. Now I'm just trying to fuck them.
He picked up a chick with a line about the price of used cars in Sri Lanka and developing economies. Step it up.
I guess I've just seen a lot of penises since then
they asked me about my neuroscience major and I said 'the brain is the outer space of the body' and passed out. it appears my ivy league education is not going to waste
She said she didn't know what fireball was. We are no longer friends.
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
I'm supposed to be at work in 10 min, I just woke up and am 45 min away...tinder for the win
About the whale....I wasn't completely awake.
Randomize
