marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
its simple. when his lips are on my clitoris i want to marry him. when they are speaking i want to kill him.
the fucking easter bunny is here. he just made 3 cups in a row. no one knows who he is..
I mean I woke up wearing my bathing suit which blows my mind
If I wanted to fuck someone, I'd go for John. I'm meeting Bryan cuz I wanna get to know him better. And eventually fuck him. But not this Tuesday.
Nothing like a little anal leakage to start off Sunday morning. Can't decide if that speaks well of my weekend or not...
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
You are too young to settle down enjoy your life. The window to get drunk and have casual sex with strangers gets smaller by the day.
Considering adding a large amount of vodka to my tomato cup-a-soup at work. Save me.
I feel like my vagina was just in a fistfight.
There is a goat eating lettuce out of our fridge. Do you wanna grab a bloody mary?
Apparently, im the only one in the world who thinks Larry King is hot.
I woke up with pitch black feet and crushed doritos around my mouth. That's how I determined how my night went
Just sold my panties for 40 bucks to some rando dude at the gay bar. I think I found a way to fund next years spring break trip. Hello cancun!
It may be a corded vibrator from the 90s but it gets the job DONE
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