i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
Also my back is semi rug burned and I'm holding you fully responsible.
I would love to give you more rug burn
We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
We learned a lot about one another. I showed him around the town I grew up in and he informed me that he has had a threesome and killed a cat
Drunk me made out with someone's girlfriend last night, was invited to their place for a semi-threesome, and then walked home at three am. Can't decide if this is better or worse than drunkenly challenging everyone to taekwondo sparring matches...
We fucked like animals and then decided we actually liked each other so then we made love. It's a match made in heaven.
Whatever. I hate you. My vagina hates you. I hope a bird shits on your head today.
She said I had a really great aura. Which I think is hippie code for "I bet you can give me a mind melting orgasm"
I was wondering why are people staring at me til I realized I was bra-less with a lei around my neck
I love you, and I just washed my hair in my work sink with handsoap.
Holy fuck, my entire boob is bruised! Lierally my boob is just one big bruise.
Just saw the cop you hooked up with over break. He’s def hotter in uniform.
Tell him to stop shaving his pubes. #Notmyjam
This morning we had sex while he was wearing a full length fur jacket and sunglasses... I wasn't even phased
We found him. He just came running out of the closet with a bruise on his face saying he has been fighting elves in Narnia for a year.
Randomize
