fuck, i think i'm broken. Alchyhol air mattress = the suck.
is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
During sex she told me I could do anything I wanted to her. You remember that toy lightsaber we bought at Wal Mart?
just to let you know, its not cheating if i cant feel my hands.
Shes been standing with her arms crossed in front of the mirror for 45 minutes...she told me she's "getting sober"
i have this gut feeling friday is going to be interesting.\nAnd by interesting I mean I feel like im going to get punched in the face by his girlfriend.
I have been referring to it as "thanks for getting out of me day" all week. Do you think they will still take me to brunch tomorrow?
Good news. I heard back from the doctor and I don't have a liver problem.
...yet.
Yea. It was an issue. Great time though. Apparently I went through the coat check, put my coat on and forgot I had it so I tried to go through again and just didn't understand why thy weren't helping me. Dave coat checked his pants.
You called my nipples compassionate. What does that even mean?
I just chugged whiskey at 7 AM because going to breakfasts at Brendas doesnt seem right if Im not real drunk. I feel like when Brenda takes my order she can tell Im drunk and will take care of me.
Was he a virgin!? DID YOU TAKE A GUY'S VIRGINITY ON MY FLOOR!?
I'm trying to find some better sex background music so his neighbors don't hate us. This is tedious.
Pretty sure I just got the ok to have a one night stand in Maui...from mom. I'd say that's a win in my book.
Probably some sort of karmic revenge for me looking at titties somewhere along the way
and for that you shall suffer
God: I won't strike you down, but I shall introduce your child to Doja Cat during a quarantine
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