If you were a Panda and I were a Koala and we had a baby, it'd be a falafel. Just think about that.
kristin has been a bad kristin
Best morning ever. I saw a bum giving another bum a blowjob downtown.
I've banged too many servicemen's wives to still be considered an American.
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
Its official vodka lemonade jager and whiskey with coorslight is a bad combination of try to forget the work week cocktail ps bring alkaseltzer
Tell Chris I said sorry for yelling "It's my vagina, let me do what I want with it!" at the party last night.
I'm taking ecstasy it's gonna be that kind of Vegas trip
Antibacterial soap and prayers does not for spermicide make
you grabbed the breathalyzer at dinner, blew a 0.20 and told the waitress you'd eat her ass
I know you like got hit by a car but do you want to come to my birthday pardi
It's hard to talk dirty with a mouth full of peanut butter
The fact that I made out with a twenty one year old father is kind of worrying me now. Like. This is exactly what I wasn't supposed to do in life.
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
that may or may not have been my penis.
Randomize
