Locked eyes w/ her at mainstreet, and said 'yeah yeah get it!' From there we started violently making out on the dancefloor (I had a FULL boner, ps) and then I got her number
you thought that fire hydrant was a midget...you gave it a hug and asked for a lollipop.
woke up and her hair clip was clamped around my shaft
I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
Even though he was watching you pee on his bedroom floor, you kept denying it and saying he was dreaming
She almost killed me. The shot she handed me had tacks in it. Wtf?!
there's a strong possibility i came on your eyeliner last night bathroom sex was unplanned and rather messy sorry
Hows the party lookin?
At a live sex show right now. Not sure about the employee party
I'm back in the dating scene now... Since the legality issue calmed down. And my stalking charges were dropped.
Nothing says happy valentines day like waking up to a naked man you hooked up with taking a walk of shame
Summers almost over and we haven't golfed, got naked or had sex yet. Let's do all three in one day, no particular order.
The Royals are in the World Series. I've never drank so much in one week in my life.
I want you
Nvm, now I want someone who replies to my booty-call texts faster
when she didn't finish her burrito you wanted to call the cops because you said it was neglect
Randomize
